Dear People Who Plaster TMI All Over Their Online Profile

Dear People Who Plaster TMI All Over Their Online Profile (and Then Get Pissy About Responses They Receive),

If you make the deep darkness of your personal life explicit to THE WORLD, then maybe you will also be able to just feed us the platitudes you'd like a as a response. Making statements that are technically addressed to everyone but really are quite obviously meant to be interpreted by a very specific person are why the telephone was invented. Have one? Know how to operate it? FAB!

Sincerely,

ECK

Lets be real, I love the book of faces just as much (if not possibly more?) than the average 18-24 year old and of course I am guilty of making shrouded claims that I was secretly hoping a certain person would pick up on.. Granted, I was 18 at the time... Its SO sadly transparent when people vaguely write messages to someone who has jilted them, a friend that they're mad at, etc. Not to mention the blatant attention/ sympathy- seeking behavior heavily implied by the lack of detail. If you're going to put it out there at all, explain your damn self and don't wait for all the saps to beg "OMG Whats wrong?! Call me if you need to talk!!"